The simple fact is that no advice, book or experience with children can possibly prepare for what it's like until the actual day that the baby is born and she/he is put in your arms. I had truly thought that having been an aunt since the small age of 9, I had an upper hand or clue as to what it would be like but I was seriously mistaken.
So here's my story. Like I said, I was very lucky to become an aunt at 9 (no my sibling is not a hoe, she's 15 years older than me) and it has been amazing. My nephy actually just turned 18 this year and it makes me feel mad old. I got to babysit all I want - my sister and brother-in-law had free help (well, free minus the cash for pizza). I had to go to infant CPR class and make sure my parents were within calling distance, but I loved babysitting for my nephew when I was kid. I babysat all the time. I loved it. I lived for hanging out with my sister and her kid.
Flash forward to now. I have 7 nieces and nephews and many friends with kids and frankly, I got cocky. I thought I was ready to be "mom" all day/everyday and I was so wrong.
I was unprepared for the emotional roller coaster that you go on after you have a baby. Everything made me cry - and we were having so many nursing issues that it made me even more upset. My husband would come home everyday to an emotional wreck of a person and it was terrible. No one tells you how HARD it is to get your baby to nurse and the nurses I had at my hospital gave me all different types of advice so when I got home - it sucked. I was a bitch to everyone. Especially my husband. I felt off and the weather was shitty - and I felt like my dog was being left behind and it was making me feel worse.
It was hard. Life was hard. Nursing was hard as balls.
Thankfully I discovered the world of exclusively pumping and baby girl is still getting breastmilk (but that's another story). Once I discovered that I could EP (exclusively pump) - things changed dramatically - but then we thought she had colic - but it was reflux. And then she started to just want to snuggle with mommy all day/everyday. But being a mom is an everyday job. You don't get sick days. You don't get time off for good behavior (like jail) - you are a mom, all the time.
I feel like at this point in time, I have a good grasp on how to be a mom, a good wife, a good dog mommy and still prepare dinner. Who knows if that will change again in a month or a week - but right now. In this moment, I love my little life and I feel at peace.
Motherhood is tough. It's probably the toughest thing anyone will ever do - and it's made worse by mommy wars. Everyone gets sad. Everyone has bad days - but the bad days will balance out the good ones. You will constantly feel like you are not doing a good job and text friends (good friends.) You will judge and be judged but I feel like if you remember that no one knows that they're doing and to take it one day at a time. It will slowly get better. But ladies if it doesn't - don't be afraid to ask for help.
And now, some of the best of the lists of the web about "things they don't tell before you become a parent"...
From Huffington Post...